Seeing my children’s hopes and dreams crushed usually makes me feel similarly crestfallen. But not today, dear friends. You see, I have been telling my boys for the past week to go up to their bedroom and pick up all Lego pieces that have fallen to the floor and become embedded in the carpet. I don’t know how many of you have endured the experience of stepping on Lego shrapnel, but let me tell you, the pain is similar to hearing my total amount due at the Lego store when I take my boys twice a year to purchase more Lego sets for their birthdays.

Now imagine a Lego minefield, an entire bedroom of Lego blocks scattered across the floor. My children have caused splits in my heel from stepping on these tiny landmines. Today, I had reached my limit. I sent them upstairs to their room where they were instructed in no uncertain terms they were not to leave their bedroom until all of the blocks had been safely stowed away in their plastic bins. A while later they came down for lunch. I asked them if they had cleaned up and they assured me that they had (poor fools). When I went upstairs to check their efforts, I was not surprised to find not only were the Lego pieces still scattered around the room, they appeared to be leaking out into the hallway.

Sometimes, punishment is poetically inspired.  Being mean is an art form for an inspired mother. And sometimes, I revel in making my children suffer, just a little, for making poor choices.

I decided to “help” my children learn a very important lesson; to take care of their belongings. Not saying a word to their lazy little bums parked downstairs on the couch enjoying some quiet time, I scooped up all of their Lego blocks. I gently closed them into their bins and I took all of the bins to a closet in the guest bedroom that they are terrified of. Sigh. They will never look there. Victory will be mine as long as I want. It was a thing of beauty as I turned out the light and closed the door softly behind me. They still haven’t discovered the horrible truth awaiting them in their bedroom. Their screams will be sweet music to my ears.